America, you're too much!

While in the US of A, I was forced to watch this gnarly commercial from a fast food chain called Red Robin. They were promoting this new burger called 'Wise Guy Burger' which, as you can see from the picture above, is a stack of bun, beef, pepperoni, pickles, tomatoes, marinara sauce and wait for it... CHEESE STICKS! No wonder why a child dies every time Bono clicks his magic fingers!

Being a skeptic, I couldn't believe it was real, so I headed over to www.redrobin.com to find out what else have they got in store for the ones looking to end their lives. They have this thing called 'The Customizer' where you can choose your basic burger and top it up as much as you want, print and bring it to the restaurant and they'll make your dream come true. Naturally I made one...

And it also has the nutrition calculator which helps you calculate how quickly you will die. Can anyone think of an easier way to access heaven (and/or hell)?!